I’m not here to tell you that there has been a miraculous change in my situation ~ and that everything is well. But I am here to say that though I have been walking in the darkest of valleys, God is still my very best friend and finally my heart and spirit have been renewed.
As I shared yesterday, I began listening to The Pineapple Story series again. I listened to tape #1 twice ~ it was that profound. I am so thankful that God brought them to mind today. He certainly knew how much I needed it.
Through out this tape series, Missionary Otto Koning shares how we must yield many things to God (including his garden of pineapples) in order to reach that true happiness that we can experience only when we give everything to our Lord. In this first tape, he talks about yielding our rights ~ to pretty much everything. He reminds his listeners that we don’t own anything ~ from our car and home to our peace of mind, and health, and happiness. Everything belongs to God. And when we come to that realization and lay it all at His feet (which will likely have to be a daily practice) it is then that we will have everything above and beyond what we need. It is then that we will have true happiness.
Mr. Koning discusses how God wants to make the choices in our lives. We should never say "I am never going to do that" or "I don’t want to live there or work at that job." Because as sure as anything you will find yourself doing that. I remember when I was teaching at a Christian school in the mid 1990's and I said "I will never home school." Guess what I have been doing for the past 15 years? Yes, homeschooling.
He encourages us to give all of our possessions to God ~ for God will take better care of them than we ever could. He said, "Whatever you give to God with the right motives you will never lack that thing again. Whatever He is Lord of ~ whatever He controls ~ He will always do a better job of it than we can." But it has to be our choice. God is not going to push us out of the way to achieve His will. We have to surrender. And if we don’t ~ we will struggle.
And so I gave up my rights today. It wasn’t easy but I have found myself at a place in my life where I need God to do His will in a big way. He wasn’t going to push me aside so He could do a perfect work ~ it was necessary that I step to the side. I don’t know if things will ever be restored in the way that I desire for them to be ~ I don’t know what is going to happen. I just know that I laid down my rights to everything today. And you know what? It was such a load off of my heart. To say "Lord it is all in your hands. It is yours to do with as you please." For the first day in many many days peace has been restored in my heart and spirit. Tomorrow may prove to be a "dickens of a day" ~ satan will attempt to take me back to the pit I was in ~ but God can handle him easily. Until tomorrow...........